The What the F happened moment

You know the moment when you are digging through your jeans and you go to put them on and they won't zip up or make it past your thighs no matter how many times you say 1,2,3 squeeze & suck in it, or you are about to put on a dress and the zipper won't budge. or more worst moment is when you realize that your underoos have gotten tight and no longer cover the right amount and your worried you are flashing the world like a ill dressed teenager.  Your thinking to yourself WTF happened??? 

I had this moment happen to me on New Years eve. I knew deep down that I had gained some weight. Most of my clothes were tight and I had to go up to my "never will I ever again wear this size  why do I still have you" jeans.  I was invited to first "land of the viking" New Year Party and I was excited.After searching for the perfect dress for a couple of days I finally found it 2 weeks before the party. It was snug but it fit.  Fast forward to an hour before the party and I pulled on the dress and slowly tried to zip it up but no go. I asked for some help but once I looked into my husbands eyes I knew that it wasn't going to fit. WTF flashed through my brain again.

And then I had two thoughts:

Decision A: Cry....cry some more become depressed, reach for the little brown squares of bliss, cry some more, contemplate refusing to go to the party because your Mcfatty, cry ,  and have a big choco binge party to ring in the New Year
Decision B:  Shred a couple tears because you realized you are at the same point again, look yourself in the mirror (really good hard look), promise yourself that you are done, done binging, don't feeling sorry for yourself, done being "fat", done being unhealthy, done making bad choices,  realize that YOU have the power to change and realizing it is the first step.

And this is my WTF happened moment that started it all     brought to you by just saying no

"We spend January 1 walking through our lives, room by room, drawing up a list of work to be done, cracks to be patched. Maybe this year, to balance the list, we ought to walk through the rooms of our lives... not looking for flaws, but for potential."
-Ellen Goodman